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Surviving Distractions: How to identify them and how to stop them

By Felicia Clark 
I sit down to do a write-up with my deadline for completion in two days. After showering, I change into my pajama bottoms and an oversized shirt. I grab a glass of wine, chips, and my laptop. My blanket and pillow are on the sofa. My rain sounds are going. I decided that everything's in place. I plop onto my sofa and proceed to write. All of sudden, PANDEMONIUM. “Ma! Can you please bring me a towel?! I forgot to grab one!” One of my sons yelled from the bathroom.
After grabbing a towel and handing it to an awaiting hand sticking out the slit of the bathroom door, I sat back down upon the sofa and proceeded to write. 
Ring! Ring! Unh unh, not answering. The phone stops ringing. Ring! Ring! Same number. Not answering. Then it rings AGAIN! Same number, belonging to my bestie. She’s called 3 times in a row. She never does that. Something must be wrong. I decided to call her back and try to make it short; no more than 10 minutes, tops. 

Thirty minutes later, she’s just get…
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A Sucker's Holiday!

Penned by Trinity
Let me start by saying I've had a wide range of experiences in the last few years. I've had dudes that were so in love with me that they wouldn't even let me buckle my damn seat belt by myself. On the contrary I've had dudes who would see me carrying a baby, a whole load of laundry, detergent and fabric softener while going down a flight of stairs and wouldn't even hold the door for me. This was MY BOYFRIEND MIND YOU! So you know the chances of any holiday being special were.... about 0. You know what they say, life is like a box of chocolates.... y'all know the rest. (Le Sigh)
Since we're on the subject of chocolate, let's discuss El Dia de la Muerte para La Side Chicks; jour du Judgement dernier (Doomsday). Excuse my french, literally. More commercially known as Valentine's Day. One of the most civilly divisive days on the western calendar. Chicks happy in love are running around making plans, While single chicks are tucked away somewhere feeling some type of way. Their all trying to prove that they're really not the perpetual stereotypes associated with this holiday. Boo'd up girls: "Oh my man loves me everyday but we just like to do it big for Cupid, you know??" Single girls: " I love taking myself out, and even though I'm alone I'm not lonely". (Insert side eyes for both types of chicks). And I? I fall somewhere in the middle.

I love love, however I've been traumatized by ghosts of Valentine's Days past. The worst one was in 2011, when I realized that being a highly regarded side ho was quite different from being the "girlfriend". Apparently it just means dude liked spending time with me more than his girl but because she had the title she had the day. At the time though I knew none of this. I had spent the week leading up pondering what I would get the man that had everything. He was about that #traplife and had so much money (think the younger version of Winter's dad in the Coldest Winter Ever). I wasn't going to embarrass myself trying to buy him anything. So I decided to go the homemade route which required more effort than money. I baked cupcakes, lit enough candles to start the second Chicago fire, picked up the brightest sexiest red lingerie I could find. I planned to completely relax and love on this man. It would be magical. #Blackgirlmagical even.

Once everything had been set up I called him to see how long he'd be. He said "Gimme 45 minutes, baby". The only problem was, 45 minutes turned into 2 hours, then 4 hours, then the next day. No call no text no smoke signal. I laid in my bed half dressed, dejected, rejected and ANGRY. So angry my chest hurt and my ears burned. I felt stupid. That was actually really funny to me, I burst into an uncontrollable laughter at about 7 in the morning. "Naked and stupid" I thought. "Good news is, we will never be this dumb again". I thought as I vowed to never ever get close enough to someone to want to do this for them again. I heard Dashiki from “Don't be a menace”..In my ear.

Thus, a savage was born, dude called and texted and BLEW. MY. PHONE. UP. but hey don't let my story be your story.
I love to see people in love. It's beautiful,  All I'm saying is don't get caught like a sucker.
He should treat you special on any given day, not only on the day some stranger picked.
If you can't find him on that day and he ain't dead, he don't wanna be found!! Happy Valentine's Day y'all!!!!!!
#Sistagurlout #trinitypenning #valentinesdayisforsuckas

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